Friday, April 3, 2009
Malice Hidden In Surrealism
Xasthur - Malice Hidden in Surrealism
One of my earliest memories was falling into a swimming pool in the early morning hours, when no one was awake. My older sister (who passed away in 2006) heard the splash and saved my life. I remember the abyss of water below me, attempting to swallow me.
I have this feeling inside that returns every now and then to mock me and make me feel shame. It's been happening all throughout my life. I hate it... I feel my soul being eroded the more I allow it to take hold. It's automatic, everything else sort of falls away and I am all alone and sinking into self-loathing thoughts. I wish it would stop but I feel like I deserve to feel this way. It's a moment in time which cycles and never fails to send me to inner hell.
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2 comments:
I am afraid that is a thought process that pervades throughout the lives of many and characterises the nature of our existence.
I do hope that you will eventually pull yourself out of this inner hell and find beauty in the sweet caress of your inner divinity.
Cheers, my friend.
Andre
The ALIEN Project
www.thealienproject.com
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Thanks. I always come out of it eventually, but sometimes I feel like I might not. It makes me feel selfish, really... What I'm going through right now is nothing compared to what others have to go through. I just can't see that when I'm down in it though.
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