Godspeak

This whole moon thing is affecting me a little more than I expected it would... I feel a little cold and emotionless lately. I got in a pretty big fight with my sister last night over her constant interruption of my attempts at sleeping. Of course, I do this just as she is on her period, so it got blown way out of proportion. I felt like an ape as we flung metaphorical shit back and forth at each other. I can't wait to be away from this person. I try and bring up my own argument for why I feel the way I do (which I've politely kept to myself until this point), and all she can do is tell me I have no friends and no one cares about me, while telling me she deserves to do whatever she wants because she does the dishes, and I don't deserve anything because I don't have a job. *sigh* It just kind of amazes me how senseless some people can be.

Anyway... Who cares? Just venting a little.

I've been thinking about synchronicity all day. I added some stuff onto the end of a Sync Whole post (G Eye of the Average Joe), and I was a little overwhelmed by the connections I found (and it wasn't even that many). It's really great being a part of that site, I never imagined I'd have an opportunity to work with the likes of Jake Kotze and the rest of those guys, each of whom I respect deeply. I just don't know exactly how to explain what I'm finding, or what it really means. I've decided not to come to conclusions on anything, and it's proving to be a bit of a challenge. I see conclusions as a sort of dead end... There is nowhere left to go with an idea which you have found a conclusion for. Life/Death is such a thing... It seems any time I feel I know everything about a certain subject, it kind of damages my ability to pick up on different points of view concerning that subject.

I titled this post "Godspeak" because of this dialog that has been playing out in my mind all day. I've just been listening to music and trying to piece together a model inside my mind, but I'm not sure what the model is supposed to be. There is a sort of uncertainty accompanying my thoughts, and a sense of urgency concerning my current perception of things. Also, it's good to not see repeating letters/numbers every now and then. ;)